diff --git a/servers/puppet/modules/humbug/files/pagerduty_nagios.pl b/servers/puppet/modules/humbug/files/pagerduty_nagios.pl
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+#!/usr/bin/env perl
+
+
+# Nagios plugin that sends Nagios events to PagerDuty.
+#
+# Copyright (c) 2011, PagerDuty, Inc. <info@pagerduty.com>
+# All rights reserved.
+# 
+# Redistribution and use in source and binary forms, with or without
+# modification, are permitted provided that the following conditions are met:
+#     * Redistributions of source code must retain the above copyright
+#       notice, this list of conditions and the following disclaimer.
+#     * Redistributions in binary form must reproduce the above copyright
+#       notice, this list of conditions and the following disclaimer in the
+#       documentation and/or other materials provided with the distribution.
+#     * Neither the name of PagerDuty Inc nor the
+#       names of its contributors may be used to endorse or promote products
+#       derived from this software without specific prior written permission.
+# 
+# THIS SOFTWARE IS PROVIDED BY THE COPYRIGHT HOLDERS AND CONTRIBUTORS "AS IS" AND
+# ANY EXPRESS OR IMPLIED WARRANTIES, INCLUDING, BUT NOT LIMITED TO, THE IMPLIED
+# WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY AND FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE ARE
+# DISCLAIMED. IN NO EVENT SHALL PAGERDUTY INC BE LIABLE FOR ANY
+# DIRECT, INDIRECT, INCIDENTAL, SPECIAL, EXEMPLARY, OR CONSEQUENTIAL DAMAGES
+# (INCLUDING, BUT NOT LIMITED TO, PROCUREMENT OF SUBSTITUTE GOODS OR SERVICES;
+# LOSS OF USE, DATA, OR PROFITS; OR BUSINESS INTERRUPTION) HOWEVER CAUSED AND
+# ON ANY THEORY OF LIABILITY, WHETHER IN CONTRACT, STRICT LIABILITY, OR TORT
+# (INCLUDING NEGLIGENCE OR OTHERWISE) ARISING IN ANY WAY OUT OF THE USE OF THIS
+# SOFTWARE, EVEN IF ADVISED OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH DAMAGE.
+
+
+use Pod::Usage;
+use Getopt::Long;
+use Sys::Syslog;
+use HTTP::Request::Common qw(POST);
+use HTTP::Status qw(is_client_error);
+use LWP::UserAgent;
+use File::Path;
+use Fcntl qw(:flock);
+
+
+=head1 NAME
+
+pagerduty_nagios -- Send Nagios events to the PagerDuty alert system
+
+=head1 SYNOPSIS
+
+pagerduty_nagios enqueue [options]
+
+pagerduty_nagios flush [options]
+
+=head1 DESCRIPTION
+
+  This script passes events from Nagios to the PagerDuty alert system. It's
+  meant to be run as a Nagios notification plugin. For more details, please see
+  the PagerDuty Nagios integration docs at:
+  http://www.pagerduty.com/docs/nagios-integration.
+
+  When called in the "enqueue" mode, the script loads a Nagios notification out
+  of the environment and into the event queue.  It then tries to flush the
+  queue by sending any enqueued events to the PagerDuty server.  The script is
+  typically invoked in this mode from a Nagios notification handler.
+
+  When called in the "flush" mode, the script simply tries to send any enqueued
+  events to the PagerDuty server.  This mode is typically invoked by cron.  The
+  purpose of this mode is to retry any events that couldn't be sent to the
+  PagerDuty server for whatever reason when they were initially enqueued.
+
+=head1 OPTIONS
+
+  --api-base URL
+    The base URL used to communicate with PagerDuty.  The default option here
+    should be fine, but adjusting it may make sense if your firewall doesn't
+    pass HTTPS traffic for some reason.  See the PagerDuty Nagios integration
+    docs for details.
+
+  --field KEY=VALUE
+    Add this key-value pair to the event being passed to PagerDuty.  The script
+    automatically gathers Nagios macros out of the environment, so there's no
+    need to specify these explicitly.  This option can be repeated as many
+    times as necessary to pass multiple key-value pairs.  This option is only
+    useful when an event is being enqueued.0
+
+  --help
+    Display documentation for the script.
+
+  --queue-dir DIR
+    Path to the directory to use to store the event queue.  By default, we use
+    /tmp/pagerduty_nagios.
+
+  --verbose
+    Turn on extra debugging information.  Useful for debugging.
+
+=cut
+
+# This release tested on:
+# Debian Sarge (Perl 5.8.4)
+# Ubuntu 9.04  (Perl 5.10.0)
+
+my $opt_api_base = "https://events.pagerduty.com/nagios/2010-04-15";
+my %opt_fields;
+my $opt_help;
+my $opt_queue_dir = "/tmp/pagerduty_nagios";
+my $opt_verbose;
+
+
+sub get_queue_from_dir {
+	my $dh;
+	
+	unless (opendir($dh, $opt_queue_dir)) {
+		syslog(LOG_ERR, "opendir %s failed: %s", $opt_queue_dir, $!);
+		die $!;
+	}
+	
+	my @files;
+	while (my $f = readdir($dh)) {
+		next unless $f =~ /^pd_(\d+)_\d+\.txt$/;
+		push @files, [int($1), $f];
+	}
+
+	closedir($dh);
+	
+	@files = sort { @{$a}[0] <=> @{$b}[0] } @files;
+	return map { @{$_}[1] } @files;
+}
+
+
+sub flush_queue {
+	my @files = get_queue_from_dir();
+	my $ua = LWP::UserAgent->new;
+
+	# It's not a big deal if we don't get the message through the first time.
+	# It will get sent the next time cron fires.
+	$ua->timeout(15);
+	
+	foreach (@files) {
+		my $filename = "$opt_queue_dir/$_";
+		my $fd;
+		my %event;
+
+		print STDERR "==== Now processing: $filename\n" if $opt_verbose;
+		
+		unless (open($fd, "<", $filename)) {
+			syslog(LOG_ERR, "open %s for read failed: %s", $filename, $!);
+			die $!;
+		}
+		
+		while (<$fd>) {
+			chomp;
+			my @fields = split("=", $_, 2);
+			$event{$fields[0]} = $fields[1];
+		}
+		
+		close($fd);
+
+		my $req = POST("$opt_api_base/create_event", \%event);
+		
+		if ($opt_verbose) {
+			my $s = $req->as_string;
+			print STDERR "Request:\n$s\n";
+		}
+		
+		my $resp = $ua->request($req);
+		
+		if ($opt_verbose) {
+			my $s = $resp->as_string;
+			print STDERR "Response:\n$s\n";
+		}
+
+		if ($resp->is_success) {
+			syslog(LOG_INFO, "Nagios event in file %s ACCEPTED by the PagerDuty server.", $filename);
+			unlink($filename);
+		}
+		elsif (is_client_error($resp->code)) {
+			syslog(LOG_WARNING, "Nagios event in file %s REJECTED by the PagerDuty server.  Server says: %s", $filename, $resp->content);
+			unlink($filename);
+		}
+		else {
+			# Something else went wrong.
+			syslog(LOG_WARNING, "Nagios event in file %s DEFERRED due to network/server problems.", $filename);
+			return 0;
+		}
+	}
+
+	# Everything that needed to be sent was sent.
+	return 1;
+}
+
+
+sub lock_and_flush_queue {
+	# Serialize access to the queue directory while we flush.
+	# (We don't want more than one flush at once.)
+	
+	my $lock_filename = "$opt_queue_dir/lockfile";
+	my $lock_fd;
+	
+	unless (open($lock_fd, ">", $lock_filename)) {
+		syslog(LOG_ERR, "open %s for write failed: %s", $lock_filename, $!);
+		die $!;
+	}
+
+	unless (flock($lock_fd, LOCK_EX)) {
+		syslog(LOG_ERR, "flock %s failed: %s", $lock_filename, $!);
+		die $!;
+	}
+	
+	my $ret = flush_queue();
+	
+	close($lock_fd);
+	
+	return $ret;
+}
+
+
+sub enqueue_event {
+	my %event;
+
+	# Scoop all the Nagios related stuff out of the environment.
+	while ((my $k, my $v) = each %ENV) {
+		next unless $k =~ /^NAGIOS_(.*)$/;
+		$event{$1} = $v;
+	}
+
+	# Apply any other variables that were passed in.
+	%event = (%event, %opt_fields);
+
+	$event{"pd_version"} = "1.0";
+	
+	# Right off the bat, enqueue the event.  Nothing tiem consuming should come
+	# before here (i.e. no locks or remote connections), because we want to
+	# make sure we get the event written out within the Nagios notification
+	# timeout.  If we get killed off after that, it isn't a big deal.
+	
+	my $filename = sprintf("$opt_queue_dir/pd_%u_%u.txt", time(), $$);
+	my $fd;
+	
+	unless (open($fd, ">", $filename)) {
+		syslog(LOG_ERR, "open %s for write failed: %s", $filename, $!);
+		die $!;
+	}
+	
+	while ((my $k, my $v) = each %event) {
+		# "=" can't occur in the keyname, and "\n" can't occur anywhere.
+		# (Nagios follows this already, so I think we're safe)
+		print $fd "$k=$v\n";
+	}
+	
+	close($fd);
+}
+
+###########
+
+GetOptions("api-base=s" => \$opt_api_base,
+		   "field=s%" => \%opt_fields,
+		   "help" => \$opt_help,
+		   "queue-dir=s" => \$opt_queue_dir,
+		   "verbose" => \$opt_verbose
+		  ) || pod2usage(2);
+
+pod2usage(2) if @ARGV < 1 ||
+	 (($ARGV[0] ne "enqueue") && ($ARGV[0] ne "flush"));
+	 
+pod2usage(-verbose => 3) if $opt_help;
+
+my @log_mode = ("nofatal", "pid");
+push(@log_mode, "perror") if $opt_verbose;
+
+openlog("pagerduty_nagios", join(",", @log_mode), LOG_LOCAL0);
+
+# This function automatically terminates the program on things like permission
+# errors.
+mkpath($opt_queue_dir);
+
+if ($ARGV[0] eq "enqueue") {
+	enqueue_event();
+	lock_and_flush_queue();
+}
+elsif ($ARGV[0] eq "flush") {
+	lock_and_flush_queue();
+}